Saturday, 28 April 2007

Tony Blackburn On My Wireless

Ok, so this week hasn't seen an avalanche of neu-blogging here, but I've got my reasons. Work is an enourmous source of stress at the moment, with a whole cloud of uncertainty and worry about the very near future (which seems to get nearer every day). As a result, I've been distracting myself and haven't spent a great deal of time online. This morning, despite a will to get the hell out of the house and go and buy stuff, I found my domestic wind and cleaned the flat. Two hours later, I've been shopping for breakfast, hoovered, dusted, cleaned, tidied, washed out the cat litter tray and hung out washing to dry (it's a gorgeous clothes-drying day at least, and our novelty suspended clothesline never fails to amuse when in use). Now, I've just made an enourmous pot of strong, fresh coffee (see previous post) and I've been listening to Ronnie Corbett wibble away on the Jonathan Ross show. Pleasant enough, but that's just ended and now I've got Andrew Collins (or is it Stuart Maconie? One of them, anyway) playing shite comedy clips from 1980s stand-ups going "Ooh, technology? It's all over me head".

So, if Jasper Carrott couldn't get his head around his Betamax video in 1986, he's got bog all chance of being able to read this - so here goes:


JASPER CARROTT - YOU ARE NOT FUNNY. YOU HAVE NEVER BEEN FUNNY. YOU ARE A CRAP ERIC IDLE (AND HE'S BEEN FAIRLY CRAP TOO SINCE ABOUT 1979). GO AWAY. Oh, you have.


Now I'm listening to BBC Radio London and they've got some bloke who appears to be the bastard lovechild of Simon Bates and Tony Blackburn wibbling away. Oh - hang on - I've just checked, and it is Tony Blackburn! I can see him (and his rug) on the studio webcam right now! Fuck me. Well, if I was running BBC Radio London (a job which I may well be applying for soon..), I'd have Blackburn on all day, every day. His pleasing mix of 60's soul and inane, moronic wittering cannot be beaten.

(Choice comment from Blackburn: "I only have one thought a day". You're not kidding either, are you, Blackburn? You thought-facist.)

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